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Saturday, 23 July 2011

Sayings and words

Evening followers, welcome to todays entry entitled 'Sayings and words' a post in which I list a mere few of the sayings and words which raise my temperature and get me punching newborn children.

Business sayings. Things like 'In the loop'. Things like 'brainstorming'. Things like 'moving forward' and 'pushing the envelope'. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. YOU APPEAR TO BE USING ENGLISH BUT YOU'RE NOT MAKING ANY FUCKING SENSE. Somebody surely sits in an office all day thinking of these moronisms, parrotted in offices throughout the globe. I propose a contraption be made which is strapped to the groin of every office worker in the world. If a single nonsensical phrase or word is used, a swift punch to the bollocks from said contraption follows. This would soon eradicate this criminal abuse of English.

Americanisms. Sorry to the US followers, but some words and sayings that have been invented across the Atlantic should never have been allowed to leave. I've 'gotten' something. You've what? Gotten? What the fuck is this shit? That is not a word, it's a lazy way of saying you have received something. Another one is 'You do the Math'. It's Maths. As in MATHematicS. Why is this so difficult to grasp!? The final Americanism has got to be this. PERIOD. Why do some people insist on writing this after every point as though it suddenly gives said point irrefutable validity. I know there is a full stop/period because it's there at the end of the sentence. It's a dot at the end. You don't need to fucking tell me it's the end of the sentence.


These, however, pale into insignificant when compared with the following word, used inappropriately fucking all the fucking time. The word 'literally'. EVERYBODY USES THIS WORD ALL THE TIME. WHY WHY WHY? 'I literally walked to the shops and bought some milk'. So, you did walk to the shop and you did buy milk? WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU SAYING LITERALLY. 'I literally just arrived'. So you just arrived, did you? Yes I fucking thought so. You people deserve more than death.


Literally.
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24 comments:

  1. pv23 July 2011 at 14:57

    only time this sounds bad is if a dumb ass uses those certain words inappropriately, otherwise it makes perfect sense

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  2. WFMS23 July 2011 at 15:09

    I agree for the most part about the sayings, some of them do make sense. Others are just stupid.

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  3. Sinclair23 July 2011 at 15:50

    Words are meaningless. It's the concepts behind them that are important.

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  4. Al3xaG23 July 2011 at 16:57

    "Literally" what pv said :D

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  5. Diego Sousa23 July 2011 at 17:45

    Finnaly something interesting to see in the internet! congrats for the post!

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  6. poorfags23 July 2011 at 20:59

    It's not maths it's math!

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  7. Ferdynand Andrzej Magellan-Fritz24 July 2011 at 04:59

    This is just a pure rage. About sayings- I'm not english native speaker, so my mistakes stems from lack of attention I was supposed to give on english class. damn

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  8. Admin24 July 2011 at 05:07

    Haha your rants are crazy man, keep up the good work!

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  9. Mekkor24 July 2011 at 05:20

    wow, if i would rage about something like that... i would have died of high blood pressure

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  10. Sketchar24 July 2011 at 05:33

    Funny stuff, but seriously true, hate it when people over exaggerate something with the word literally or over the top values. Like how I spilt something, and it was like a cup worth, and the person said I spilt 2 gallons, how that works out I don't know.

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  11. Philloz24 July 2011 at 05:35

    Haha I love reading these man, please keep posting! +Followed

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  12. Dilord24 July 2011 at 07:11

    You remind me of the youtube segment: "you know what's bullshit?"
    totally dude you must be his reincarnation!
    Literally!

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  13. Mike H24 July 2011 at 08:17

    haha this must be more effective than any anger management class for you. good blog :D

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  14. FabFawk24 July 2011 at 10:14

    Haha, I love reading this blog!

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  15. ChazWellington24 July 2011 at 13:35

    Dont hate on us Americans. Even if we use slang, the point is we got the point across.

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  16. Batow24 July 2011 at 18:19

    The examples you used to the term "literally" aren't correct at all. But your last "literally" was the right one. It's used to express that you're not using a figure of speech.

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  17. DIYgaming24 July 2011 at 23:14

    You sound like me!

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  18. SlogBlog1125 July 2011 at 04:54

    @Batow I know, that's why I have them as examples of people being retarded.

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  19. TradersNook25 July 2011 at 10:55

    hahah great post.

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  20. GMSoccerPicks25 July 2011 at 11:24

    hahahaha i can feel your rage regarding the use of literally, its used so much and so badly, that it is enraging indeed.

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  21. Anonymous25 July 2011 at 13:44

    Your rage inspires me! I get so aggravated all the time but just have to keep it suppressed... of course being 6'6" and 300lbs, if I got visually mad at everything it would be kinda scary... lol

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  22. Viitoebe25 July 2011 at 22:19

    I have the same thoughts you do.
    Add +

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  23. breffmint26 July 2011 at 09:42

    I've heard plenty of non-Americans end a sentence with "full stop," so it isn't just us. ;)

    I agree with you about "literally," though. "I literally blew up at him." Really? You literally exploded into a thousand pieces?

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  24. Geojour27 July 2011 at 19:21

    Breathing does not help.

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